At about the time I wrote my last post, my nephew was in hospital. He was having trouble breathing and his oxygen saturation was down, so he spent the night there. He now appears to be fine, but it was a scary day or two. At that age, things can go so wrong so fast. This incident made me wonder if having kids is even worth it. From day one to day 10,000 or 15,000 or if you’re really (un)lucky 20,000, they’re a source of constant worry. How do you sleep at night? There’s gotta be some, I dunno, benefits to counteract the neverending stress.
Last week was probably my worst, from a mental health perspective, since I washed up in Romania way back when. Loads of lessons despite some last-minute cancellations, and those I coped with even if I sometimes got drenched on the way to them. But I’ve also had the builder here to help sort out my bathroom and at the same time throw everything out of balance, and I’ve just been, well, low. Those books, what’s the point exactly if (as is very likely) they never get published and hardly anyone reads them? Yet another exercise in futility, as if I haven’t had enough of those already. And of course I’m stuck here on my own, getting older, seeing my parents get older, wondering if and when I’ll need to go back to New Zealand and how on earth I’ll afford to live in a place where the average house costs a million dollars.
Yes, the bathroom. Last week the builder, a heavy smoker in his late forties, spent four days here gutting everything and making a start on the tiles. The builder’s name is Dan, and he’s back again today. The plumber, who should be coming on Wednesday, is Bogdan. So just like Dan, but he has to deal with the bog. Nominative determinism in action. It would have been easy if I could have just left Dan to his own devices but at times I’ve had to make decisions. Friday was a bit fraught. In a gap between lessons I went with him in his van, first to the tip, then to Dedeman where we spent well over an hour. That place, where everything is orange and blue, reminding me of Uncle Ben’s sauce, is disorienting at the best of times. In places like that I freeze, or even worse I concentrate on all the wrong things, like why it is that Romanians call the middle traffic light galben, or yellow, when they’re clearly orange. Is it because portocaliu, the Romanian word for orange, has too many syllables? (Officially in the UK, the middle light is amber, but nobody actually calls it that unless they’re trying especially hard to be an annoying twat. In the New Zealand road code – I’ve just had a look – it’s officially yellow even though everyone in NZ surely calls it orange. I see that Toby Manhire, writing about the Covid traffic light system, is no fan of the yellow designation.)
Back to Dedeman. I first had to choose some floor and ceiling tiles without pissing Dan off too much. Which browny grey or bluey grey or whitey grey do I choose? Shiny or semi-shiny or non-shiny? I almost thought, sod it, I’ll get the one with the bright pink fish. Then I chose a loo and a sink and a cupboard and so on and so forth. We made several stops as Dan got his quarter-tonne of cement and gypsum board and many other bits and pieces. I got so lost in there. “Get the trolley and bring it back to me,” he said. But, but, that’s like eight aisles away and I wasn’t paying attention. Back home, we had to haul the vast bags of cement up the stairs to my flat. I managed, but struggled to keep up with the smoker half-a-dozen years older than me.
I spoke to my brother last night. His wife’s family really go to town with Christmas activities, and he seemed almost envious of the non-Christmas I’ll end up having. He was grateful for the lockdown two years ago. We talked about our aunt who seemed pretty good on the phone when I spoke to her last week. But physically she’s a mess; my brother doesn’t think she’ll be around much longer. We discussed, of all things, the new notes and coins with King Charles’s portrait. He said that monarchs alternate the direction they look in, so Elizabeth faces right while Charles will face left (I knew that), and that queens wear crowns but kings don’t (I didn’t know that). Soon this will all be moot – cash is rapidly disappearing from Britain.
The deadliest and stupidest football World Cup ever is over. The football – none of which I watched – was a roaring success, as it was always going to be. Yesterday’s final surely ranks as one of the greatest games of all time, but why can’t they damn well decide it properly? (Five of the knockout matches, or about a third, went to penalties at this World Cup.) “Nobody has come up with a better way” is such a lazy argument. There are no end of better options. My favourite is to gradually remove players from each side after 120 minutes until someone scores. With all that space, someone is bound to. I’m aware here that I’m over 40 and younger people think shoot-outs are “sick” or whatever, so they’re unlikely to go away any time soon. By the way, I only maintained a vague interest in the World Cup (go Morocco!) because of the boys I teach, many of whom had never seen a normal World Cup before. For them, this is normal.
by 
