Escaping the danger zone

It’s a frosty Saturday morning and I’m listening to Kim Hill’s programme on the radio. She’s interviewing an expert in levitated dipole reactors. She’s always struck me as someone with an arty bent, but she’s spent the entire (long) interview asking intelligent and insightful questions, as if she actually knows what she’s talking about. She’s a clever bugger, basically.

It’s nice to get out – away from Mum and Dad’s place which, while their extension work is in progress, is an accident waiting to happen. We’re falling over each other to grab knives or plates or tins of tomatoes. They have about a fifth of the plug points they need. The kettle? The toaster? Dad’s iPad? Choose one. Cooking here is one level above camping. Washing clothes is impossible. The builders are here every weekday, and they seem great (as they should be, given the vast sums involved). Mum and Dad tell me what will be where when the work is all done – the sliding doors will be here, the pantry here, the island here (did we always have islands?) and it will look great when it’s finished I’m sure, but the place will still be impractical, and increasingly so as my parents age. In two or three years they’ll probably move again.

We went into Timaru yesterday. We parked down on the bay, as we used to all those years ago, although then it was always summer; it was lovely to see the snowy mountains over Caroline Bay on a chilly but sunny day. I went to ASB to find my KiwiSaver balance and dealt with a helpful young woman who spoke the same language as me and wasn’t overwhelmed with other (angry) customers. We had a chat and she showed dollar projections on her screen for the various funds. I asked how those estimates were arrived at. Mean? Median? Half the time above, half below? She couldn’t answer that. I moved my money into the second most aggressive fund, with the intention of dialling it down a notch in a few years’ time, and hoped for the best. I was very happy that my parents popped into House of Travel – they’re serious about a trip to Europe next year. We visited my aunt – Mum’s older sister, who lost her husband in 2021 – and that was great. I’ve always got on well with her. She’s aged and the outer edges of her memory are becoming slightly fuzzy. She talked about her daughter in Wellington who is battling jaw cancer; reading between the lines, things don’t look good there. It was what she didn’t say. On the way back I was pleased to see that some unspectacular old cars, like the odd Ford Laser from the eighties, were still kicking around.

We did some shopping at Pak ‘n’ Save, or at least Mum did. She commented on the ballooning prices, but I was surprised how cheap things were. Most items were only a little more expensive than in Romania, but average earnings must be close to triple what people live on over there. Food products are massively more affordable here. (Housing is another matter.) We came back via Temuka, to visit the laundromat. A load took about half an hour to wash and cost $4.50. There was an enormous plume of choking black smoke from around the saleyards opposite. Entering both Timaru and Temuka, I noticed a weird trend for translating placenames from what I thought were Maori anyway into real Maori. Te Tihi-o-Maru. Te Umu Kaha.

Last night we watched the women’s World Cup quarter-final between Sweden and Japan. A very good game, which the much more physically imposing Sweden dominated for the most part but ended with the Swedes hanging on for dear life – during lashings of injury time – for a 2-1 win. Mum slept through most of it. There were ex-players in the studio; one of them was unable to answer a question without saying “absolutely”.

It’s election season again, which in New Zealand means you get all those crazy opinion poll figures with spurious decimal places: 37.8 to 32.1. I’d forgotten about those. C’mon, when your data is subject to so much sampling variation, you gotta ditch those decimals; 38 to 32 is the only way to handle it. You don’t get decimal degrees in weather forecasts, and including them in polls is worse than that would be.

A brand-new vape shop in Temuka with bollards to prevent ram raids. Crazy, really.

This flatiron-shaped building on the corner of the Loop Road housed Mascot Finance until it went under in (I think) 2009

The old backpackers’ lodge


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